CATCH US IF YOU CAN!

Good luck, boys, but you'll never catch us. Oh, and don't think you can find us by tracking down our computer where we posted this blog. Thanks to WiFi, we can post anywhere. Sometimes we've even been known to use a public library computer. Once, on a dare from my pagan caveman boyfriend, I even posted from the lobby of a Miami-Dade county police station. That was exciting and fun. Nokosee was waiting outside on Chief Osceola's chopper I stole a couple of months ago and I swear he almost shit in his pants when he saw a bunch of cops entering the building after their donut break. I mean the guy's a lean mean fightin' machine but when it comes to me, he's a big wus. Which is cool.

Nokosee's dad keeps telling us he "needs to hear some music." He's threatening to kidnap some rock band or something to play for our little band of renegades out in the middle of the freaking Everglades. Although Nokosee can kill with his middle finger, he's a darling. His dad on the other hand, can kill with both fingers and is certifiably deranged. I wouldn't put it past him hijacking some clueless rock band crossing the Everglades in their tour bus. The old man and I don't see eye-to-eye on a lot of things. Especially music. He's a freaking middle-aged hippie locked in the 60's. He's always humming or singing songs from Hair around our camp site. I swear, if I hear "Gliddy-gloppy-gloopy" one more time I think I'll take a hatchet to the old bastard myself.

Right now I'm groovin to the Screaming Females. On YouTube. (Hey, I might be living out in the middle of nowhere with a bunch of critters, gators, and nut cases, but thanks to the old man's insanity, we got electricity.) Marissa Paternoster is the band's lead singer and she plays a guitar like a rock god. I just love her so much. She's adorable-cool with her Ramones dew and sometimes when I see her play I swear she's channeling Johnny Ramone who, it seems in death, learned a few more chords. When I see her sitting on the floor while slamming her ax and shaking her head about like that kid in the Exorcist, I swear she's possessed-- in fact she makes possession look cool. I just want to kiss her and squeeze her-- and not in a lesbo sort of way either. Even Nokosee-- the first of the "New Seminole" raised on 60's rock and Hair-- hell, his kid sister's named after one of the show's writers but like in Miccosukee-- is bangin' his head right along with me. I don't know if she can kill with her finger like he can, but she slays me. And brings tears to my eyes because its so beautiful what she's doing. It transcends soul in its delivery. I call it Gut Rock because that's where it's coming from. I hate to say it, but if they ever get down here for a gig, I might have the old man kidnap them for a show in the swamp. In case you've never heard of them, they come from where I once lived: New Jersey. I embedded one of their video's below for you to check them out. Marissa sings like how I feel right now. She's the real thing, a true phenom 'cause when she screams you can feel it in your soul. She screams for you. She screams for me. She screams for all of us. Mark my words, this chick is going to the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. God bless her.

Not rockin' in a club is one of the things I miss the most.

Gotta go. My paranoia alarm is going off. Talk to you later.

Stormy Jones
New Seminole